It's Delicate.

Damien Rice's song came on.



We might kiss when we are alone
When nobody's watching
We might take it home
We might make out when nobody's there
It's not that we're scared
It's just that it's delicate

So why'd you fill my sorrows
With the words you've borrowed
From the only place you've known
And why'd ya sing Hallelujah
If it means nothing to ya
Why'd you sing with me at all?

We might live like never before
When there's nothing to give
Well how can we ask for more
We might make love in some sacred place
The look on your face is delicate

So why'd you fill my sorrow
With the words you've borrowed
From the only place that you've known
And why'd ya sing Hallelujah
If it means nothing to ya
Why'd you sing with me at all?









I hate this. I hate you for leaving.

Please.

"Be to her virtues very kind, be to her faults a little blind."

-Matthew Prior

Sweetly Broken.

To all:

1. I can't do this anymore. The little white lies keep building up. I know you're lying so I keep a running count. It's more than it should have ever been. Everytime I see you it makes it harder. I can't trust you. I wish you would just leave already. Get away from here...from me. It's like trying to keep water in your cupped hands. No matter what you do, you know it will soon be gone.

2. It's the best its ever been. Yet I'm not sure if its time. I can't take that step...you should know that by now. The things you said...it was too much. Too much, too soon. Too much at one time. It's not that I think you can't handle me. For the first time, it's I think I won't be able to handle you.

3. The things you told me... I didn't know where it was coming from. Could I be that oblivious to the people that surround me? I know you think it would be the greatest travesty if there was no attempt. But I think the attempt would be wasted from the start. There would be no sort of normalcy. No sense of security.

4. I can't stay in this limbo with you. Choose sides. You have a girl. So leave me alone. I'm not obligated to you anymore.

5. You have always been there for me. No matter what. I don't understand how our situation could happen. Only storybooks follow that road. I just hate that we're worlds away. Come away with me.

Worst Possible Outcome.

I'm not trying to break your heart. Honestly.



And you'll probably hate me for the rest of your life.



But I just can't. It's not in my nature. I'm a creature of habit. And it's not in my habits either.

...

"Sometimes, I get speechless...completely lose my train of thought...because I have you on my mind..."


:( I'm a fan of flight...









Take me far away from here...

No More Attempts.

So I said I was giving up on trying with you.

And tonight was the last time.

You're right. I'm too nice for my own good.

Deja Vu.

IT happened again. It skipped a beat.

You are so over.

And out.

Let Them Eat CUPcakes!

It really is the little things...the simplest pleasures that make my day.




Cupcakes, for example.

Or my pets. My bed. Ice water. Ice cream. Soup. Smiles. Dimples. Sand between my toes. Clean linens. A great cuddler. Good conversation. Books. New words. Birds in flight. Rainy days and rubber boots. Leather boots.


Saturday night was not my idea of a good time. However, all horrid regrets about going to North Shore on Saturday night was overridden by my Sunday day/night. No need for explanation. But wow, I did not realize how much I missed it. The night was as close to perfect as it possibly could have been.

It's like that feeling when you think about a past moment and it makes you smile. That warm, fuzzy, my heartstrings are being pulled kind of feeling. Well, Sunday was definitely not the "awww!" type of moment; it was more of a "holy fuck!" type of day, that still makes you smile.

Get The Point.

I intensely dislike you.



You're annoying. You say things that don't need to be said. You talk too much.

We're complete opposites. And not in the "opposites attract" kind.




I don't return your phone calls. So get the hint.



Smarten up, buddy. Stop calling me.

Naivety.

I should have known. I let myself believe for one second...but not again. Never again.